And the Darwin Award Goes To...

I did not make it to the horse show this weekend--the flu turned into a whopping case of bronchitis, so Baleno is standing around all braided and ready to go and I'm flat on my back in bed. I'm somewhat relieved, since sometimes the whole dressage thing can be somewhat humiliating--I'm never quite ready, never quite spotlessly groomed, and never quite accurate enough to earn the big scores...somedays I long to go back to the eventing days.

But anyway, had I gone to the horse show I would have missed the big excitement in our neighborhood--a horse in the irrigation ditch. This is nothing new, but it's nonetheless scary and creepy when it happens, and it always involves some guy who thinks he knows the best way to get the horse out of the ditch, and some other guys who need to be experts thinking they know the best way to get the horse out of the ditch, and so forth. In fact, those of us who live near the irrigation ditch and have pulled a horse a summer out of the ditch (at least) really do know how to do it.

But how the horse got in there in the first place is a good story worth telling, and reminds me of how much it pisses me off when men get macho around horses: Two brothers riding. One knows how to ride, the other doesn't, and somehow the one who doesn't know to ride decides he needs to see if he can jump? or ride the horse in the ditch and out the other side? or? Does he realize the ditch has concrete sides? Whatever. The story is unclear, except for the fact that the guy obviously deserves the Darwin award on this Sunday morning in March.

So we did get the horse out of the ditch, a little worse for wear. He was obviously in shock, shaking and dull-eyed. There is water in the ditch for the first time since last spring, so I covered him with a wool cooler and then a heavy blanket and watched them walk off down the ditch. I later heard another shout, but with any luck they got home safely and the horse is fine.

As the animal control officer said (when he showed up), maybe your brother should stay off the horses for awhile until he learns to ride.